Friday, February 11, 2011

Unlived Life

I have been thinking about my Unlived Life, and it is OK if you have never heard this term before.  I learned it from the work of Carl G. Jung when he spoke about children having to live the Unlived Life of their parents.

Now that I am older I am more aware of the limited time and how fast life passes us by, which has surfaced more need for deliberateness for my life.

I have to be more decisive about how I live my minutes; how I live my life.  So many times I have felt like I wanted to go forward but then I put the brakes on and all my good intentions came to an abrupt stop.  A pattern of this dynamic has shaped a good part of my life.  Another piece of this dynamic is that I want everything to be perfect before I can move forward, and guess what-perfection doesn't exist!  The result is I do not accomplish some of my goals because I'm awaiting the illusion of perfection, my foot is on the brake pedal instead of the gas pedal and I'm feeling the frustration that time is passing. 

Even though I want to be the butterfly I don't want the pressure of going through my metamorphsis.  I don't want to change.  I just want what I want when I want it.  This is called immaturity and when one is aging and can still see this trait it isn't very attractive.  Maybe you can't identify with this challenge but maybe you can.  However, because I see it and feel the power of aging it is becoming less threatening to begin to take some of these risks toward the changes I've admired from afar. 

I have given myself permission to take a bold step each week towards my Unlived Life.  I have even sought the support of a Life Coach to help me with this.  I am becoming more aware of how my controlling need for perfection is poison to my creativity that is right there waiting for me to come out and play.

My foot is off the brake and the gas pedal is on.  I'm starting to live my dreams which is living into the Unlived Life as Eleanor Roosevelt reminds us "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams."  I can now translate this to say "When we live into our dreams we are living our unlived life." 

2 comments:

Ellen said...

Linda, I've given much thought to this concept of the unlived life. It will not surprise you to know that I believe that I have, in many ways, been living my mother's unlived life. More and more I am challenging myself to discover my own unlived life. I celebrate your courage in asking for a hand as you chart your course for yourself. Letting go of the expectation of perfection is like climbing a mountain for me. Thanks for this post.

creativelife said...

Ellen,
It is always a joy to hear from you and to share your journey. I continue to think about not only the biggest challenge our parents leave us in that of the unlived life and, also what we might be leaving our children in our unlived lives. It motivates me " to stay conscious, to be willing, and to do what needs to be done."